Ayyyyyyye what up people I got some ish on my mind and of course I needed to share. Soooo I'm sitting here finally putting my reel together and I must say Im disappointed in myself. Not in my acting because Im a BEAST!!! but in my procrastination and self doubt. I have been in LA over 2 years and I thought that I would be famous by now. I assumed that I would be walking down Hollywood Blvd and a Producer would randomly stop me and say,"YOU GIRL OVER THERE OMG WE HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU TO WALK DOWN THIS VERY STREET ,(the producer would be yelling of course) and then I would be an instant star. Now life works like that for some people but not most people and unfortunately not me. I sometimes have shitty days because I sit around looking at people who I feel don't want it half as bad at me getting put in situations for flourishment (made up word). Today I finally faced my fears and started collecting footage to go in my reel and I realized I'm too freeking talented to be sitting around waiting. You see God is not just going to give me this dream, because I know its my purpose and its what I wanted my whole life, he wants me to go out and snatch it. See I have been chillin (not real people chillin I still get ish done) and waiting instead of kicking down doors my damn self.
We get too caught up in what is not happening that sometimes we don't realize that we are the reason opportunities are passing us by. For me its low key fear, a word that I hate to say or to admit that I feel sometimes, because people (especially my family) are always telling me how fearless I am, (I admit I'm pretty damn fearless). You see I grind but I have JUST started to put 100% into my grind, because a piece of me thinks if I just put 75% or even 99.9% and then I fail I can always say well it wasn't my all. That is the stupidest thing I could do to myself, I often contain my beastlyness (made up word) because its that small part of me that is unsure. But after watching my footage that I gathered for my reel it should be a crime to keep all this greatness to myself. I will never get better if I don't truly allow myself to jump not to mention I keep proving to myself I have wings
So for all you people out there that are sitting on a dream or half assing a project, contemplating starting a business ,get it together because YOU A BEAST and the world should know it... Become a Proud DREAM CHASER!!
OH YOU CARE!!!!!!!
Until next time